The Art of the Floating Grandma

My wife and I ran into a scheduling problem.  Part of this problem is of our own doing because we have not cultivated a babysitting group, but at the same time as this is our first child, we aren’t apt to let her spend a lot of time:  1. Out of our sight 2. With just anyone.  Our problem is that H has to work on a certain day earlier than I can be home to do the great juggling act known as the ‘daughter-duty-swap’  (Here’swhatsheate.Here’swhenshepooped.Here’sherbathschedule.Here’swhenthedogspooped…. whooosh!..out the door)…. (oh,anddon’tforgetthelaundry!)

This problem seems to have given us a foothold in the birth of the ‘Floating Grandparent’ phenomenon.  The ‘Floating Grandparent’ premise holds that: 1. They do not hold full time employment OR their work schedule permits them the flexibility to be at your semi-beckoned call.  Part of this reliability may be due to some sort of job loss or suspension due to our current economic pace.  (See:Blessing in disguise)  2. They also must juggle the needs of all your siblings children because YOU are not the only one who wants to take advantage of this über [crap, Josh showed me how to do that umlaut thing] cheap, über flexible childcare force. 3. They honor your expectations for the child.  Bedtimes, teeth-brushing, no ice cream as a meal staple, non-candy eating forays are reasonably honored (this is in direct contrast to the ‘I’m a grandparent and I get to do whatever I damn well please’ hypothesis that gets presented in many the court of family rules/dispute jurisdiction).

I am of the opinion that this relationship needs to be nurtured so a couple of guidelines are probably in order:

1. Don’t overuse the resource.  The more the Floating Grandparent needs to be with your child/children, the less likely it is that you can hide the tantrums, tears and tirades from them, thus leading to a mild hesitancy when asked to assist.

2. Make it at least budget neutral for them.  Are they going to take your money as a wage? No.  Buy a gas card, dinner or send some pictures from time to time.  Maybe crochet them a nice afghan to wrap around their shoulders as they approach their Golden Years (that one hurt, didn’t it Baby Boomers? )

3.  Do things with them.  Odds are, they just don’t want to watch your child/children alone with a warmed up pizza and the latest re-run of Sesame Street.  They probably wouldn’t mind a little time of the full family dynamic as well.

4.  Say Thank You.  Always.  Never take it for granted.

After putting all this on paper, I think it is time to start working on my side business ‘Granny Express; A Full Service, On-Call Child care team whose numbers of years of experience is exponentially more than yours or mine”